I’m easier on Jackson. I realize that. He struggles more. I may not snap at him as quickly as I do Jake for annoying me. By annoying I mean hear “come here” a million times or “watch me” a hundred more. I’m annoyed, frankly mad, when Jake does something I’ve told him not to do.…Read more »
I’m sitting here thinking about all the snide comments about my texting Adam he made. How frustrated he appeared with me at times. I was nothing but nice to him, always. I’m not going to let anyone treat me like that again. Maybe I shouldn’t be that nice to people either. It reminds me of…Read more »
This morning I was blindsided by the boys asking questions about their half-sister and dad. They want to see their half-sister again. My youngest, again, wanted to know why there aren’t many photos of him with his father. I tried to explain that we weren’t together long after he was born. I didn’t want to…Read more »
Just know I feel a strong obligation to replace the boy’s father since he’s dead and the statistics of boys growing up in a fatherless household aren’t in their favor. It’s also why I’m so picky and hellbent.
Watching Jackson interact with people at the pool. They’re pretending to watch him and act interested in what he wants to show them but they’re looking annoyed. My God how hard it is to watch.
Weight: 149 lbs. Treadmill: 30 minutes Sober: 10 days Mindset: happy I’m down a whole pound. It’s about damn time. I say that but just had a little bit of ice cream. We’re celebrating. Jackson got his hearing aid today. He’s elated. The look on his face when he had the hearing aid inserted and…Read more »
First thing this morning I hear Jackson yelling at his brother for shutting the bathroom door. I hear some things I couldn’t decipher but did make out the last two words: butthole asshole. And people say they can’t understand what he’s saying! Dang it! Usually when he cusses only I can understand him. He surprisingly…Read more »